So comics, they’re violent and stuff. But this week seemed to push the cosmic envelope as three very different genres align with the same violent as to create some kind of triforce of violent power to mock the bones of Dr. Fredric Wertham.
Let’s start with Speak of the Devil #4. This miniseries just continues more and more bizarre. At first it was like a B-teen movie (I’m pretty sure B-movie and teen movie is somewhat redundant, if not complimentary for a teen movie as they are just usually god awful) that dabbled with subjects of child abuse, incest, sexual perversion, and high school sport competitions. And now it has turned into one of those B-movies I would sneak out to watch on USA Up All Night when my parents were sleeping, you know what I’m talking about—a bit of skin, a bit of violence, a lot of over the top bad acting. So now a girl, her boy friend (not boyfriend) who she occasionally screws, and her stepmom who occasionally screws her stepdaughter’s boy friend decide to go on a killing spree. There wasn’t any explanation for the whole thing...maybe that will come later. But there first victims are the stepdaughter’s boy friend’s parents. And it is bloody and involves knives being stuck through the eye sockets of good ole mom and dad.
Then let’s jump to Countdown to Final Crisis #14. I haven’t had many nice things to say about this series, but over the last few weeks it has settled into an entertaining big summer action movie. Not the highest form of art, but this is a picture book about people with meta-human powers who choose to wear spandex. So Earth-51 is getting a blowed up by alternate versions of DC superheroes from around the Multiverse. Batman-51 isn’t too happy about this. In fact, Batman-51 is the Punisher in a Batman outfit. I know, it sounds stupid. But in context it actually makes sense. Batman-51 reacts to the death of Jason Todd like a rational human. He shoots the Joker between the eyes and then proceeds to murder all the other super villians of his universe. Anyone, Batman-51 teams up with another universe’s Jason Todd and they go to war against all those attacking Gotham-51. One seen includes Jason Todd making sure an alternate Supergirl doesn’t use her heat vision by sticking knives through her eyes and cutting them out.
That leaves us with The Punisher #54. So, yeah, you’ve probably guessed what happens. The Punisher violent? Garth Ennis violent? A Punisher/Barracuda story violent? Well, yeah, there is a scene with Barracuda blinding a man by pressing his fingers through them. The funny thing is that that is probably the least violent thing about this issue which includes: a baby strapped to C4, a nose removed by a pair of pliers, castration with a pocket knife, a beheading, prison rape, not one but two arms removed by an axe, having the clip of a machine gun unloaded in your face at pointblank range, and total emotional isolation.
Screw you Dr. Wertham.
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What is up with all of this eye destroying? Is this why Jerry Orbach gave up his corpse eyes? What horrific ocular misuse! You know, if Dr. Xavier had the use of his eyes, that motherfucker could walk again and really put a dent in kind of just ignoring stuff and hoping the world would just kind of be nice. Have you ever noticed that for an eyeless white supremicist, he's a total hippie. He's all like, "Hey everybody, let's just hope that if we're mellow and wear spandex in colors that don't really go together (because the bastard doesn't have any eyes), then everybody will be cool with us even though we're always like half dolphin half crocodile half Lithuanian or like radioactive plant people or something." Fucking hippies.
But anyway, the last few pages of the Punisher were so beautifully written this month. I was really impressed. You should check out "Television". It's an indy with kind of like a "Dork" meets "The Prisoner" kind of feel. If that makes any sense at all.
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